CYOA : The Adventures of Hero >_>

You remember when I made a CYOA on Pokemon and went about school getting votes? This is what it is. Just a few things -

You can't vote twice.
You can't vote as a guest.
You can't edit posts.

That's it! So here we go.

---

Narrator : It was a bright and sunny day. The sun shone into our soon-to-be hero's room. He was called...Hero. *sigh*

Life advanced as normal for him. Eat, work, sleep, repeat...until today. (oh god, how cliche is this?)


Hero: *epic pose*...*slumps down* I'm tired, I'm gonna take a nap.

*2 hours later*

???: Help me, help me!
Hero: Whuzzahdiarghfraggle?
???: Help me, help me!
Hero: *rubs eyes* Oh, it's just the Mario game. *lies down*
???: Help me!
Hero: WHAT F***ING NOW?

*body flies out the window and hits Hero in the face*

Hero:...What the f*** was that? Whatever it is, it's gonna pay for messing up my nap!
Game: Help me, help me!
Hero: You too! *kicks N64*

*meanwhile, outside*

Dragon: *roars*
Man: Come on, we gotta kill this thing! *gets impaled*
Man 2:...*runs away*
Dragon: *marches to Hero's house*
Hero: OH SH-
Dragon: *crushes Hero's home, points and laughs*
Hero:...That's it...*notices spears nearby* Hmm...

What will Hero do?

(The poll just made things harder, so scra[ the poll idea. xD Get it? Whole idea, poll idea)

A : Pick up the spears and throw them at the dragon.
B : Retreat and get more supplies.
C : Run like a little cat.
D : Use the spears as stilts.

Come on you lazy people *cough*George*cough*. It's only about 8 lines, just post A, B, C or D depending on what you want to happen!

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It's a tiebreaker here - so you can only vote C or D! If no-one votes by tomorrow evening, I'll choose myself.

c

So it 's C! That afraid, huh?

---

Hero : Oh snap. *runs away*
Dragon : *points and laughs harder*

*a minute later*

Hero : Phew...*sees Dragon in the distance* I'll get that dragon one day...I'll gouge his eyes out - *makes stabbing motion* - and stamp all over 'is guts! *stomps*
??? : Is anything the matter, young one?
Hero : Whah! Who are you?
??? : Me? Well I'm the generic, mysterious, old man of course! I help the hero on his journey for justice, or revenge...or was it for love?
Hero : *facepalm*
M.O.M : Now, now...
Hero : You're missing a wooden staff ya' know. All old people always gotta have an old, crooked, woode -
M.O.M : *staff pops out of nowhere* You were saying?
Hero : Uh...ok...*laughs out loud*
M.O.M : What is it?
Hero : I just noticed...your initials spell 'mom'! *laughs harder*
M.O.M : Idiot. Anyway, Hero -
Hero : Hey, how d'you know my name?
M.O.M : That doesn't matter. For now, you will need to equip yourself for the many perils that stand in your way.
Hero : Cool.
M.O.M : Come into my house. *points at a massive mansion that would make Bill Gates jealous*

- In the house -

Hero : Not what I expected.
M.O.M : Well, you must expect the unexpected!
Hero : Wait a minute...*thinks*

- flashback -

Superman: Expect the unexpected.

- end flashback -

Hero : *shrugs*
M.O.M : The Legendary Blade of Hyrulia.
The Shield of Wisdom.
The Hero's -
Hero : Lol.
M.O.M : The Hero's Bow. And finally, the new Mark XII Desert Eagle with 12 inch barrel.
Hero : *stares at Desert Eagle and drools*
M.O.M : And there's only one clip in it.
Hero : F***. Well, any catch?
M.O.M : You're only allowed 2.
Hero : F*** again.

What weapons will Hero choose?

A : Wooden Sword of Hyrulia.
B : Pan Lid.
C : Plastic Bow.
D : Desert Eagle (with 7 bullets in)
E : Screw it, kill him and take them all.

A few things -

If you vote E, you can't vote for anything else.
If you didn't vote E, you have to choose 2.

Now get voting!

d and c plastic bow ftw

The way things are going, it's gonna be a Desert Eagle and a Bow! If you don't want a bow, vote quickly.

E.

A : 0
B : 0
C : 1
D : 1
E : 1

Tie-breaker! I'll update tomorrow unless someone breaks the tie.
By that, I mean two options with more votes than the others.

E

e thats what i would do

A : 0
B : 0
C : 1
D : 1
E : 3

E is winning. Unless you want to hurt a poor old man, vote!

e

We can all see where this is going, so E wins!

---

Hero : Can't I just take all of them?
M.O.M : No...
Hero : Then I'll take the gun and the sword...
M.O.M : Hmm...*hands Hero gun*
Hero : *aims and shoots at M.O.M's head*
M.O.M : Ow...
Hero : Yes!...Wait, what?
M.O.M : Careful where you point that thing! You'll run out of bul -
Hero : *shoots rest of clip*
M.O.M : Oh dear. *falls back*
Hero: Yes! *grabs the weapons and runs off*

Meanwhile in a dark, hidden, cliche'd warehouse...

?-1 : Hmm?
?-2 : So you felt it too, huh?
?-1 : Yes...Just as we expected.
?-2 : But the question is, what will he do now?
?-1 : Should we try and stop him? We can always do that.
?-2 : No! It's too early for us to waste it. Besides, we've plenty more...Muahaha...
?-1 : Ahahahaha...
?-1 and ?-2 : MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!

In a field somewhere...

Hero : I sure do like a nice breeze. *stands up and unsheathes sword* Sword of Hyrulia, eh? I couldn't even cut butter with this!

*voices*

Hero : Hmm? *ducks under grass*
??? : Yes, thanks. Oh no, you're too kind.
Familiar voice : Do be careful young one, I hear there are ravenous bandits out there!
Hero : Hey, wait a minute...*stands up*
??? : Huh?
Hero : *points* YOOOOOOOOOOOOU!...
??? : Me?
Hero : No, not you, YOOOOOOOOOOOOU!...
Familar person : Me? You must be mist -
Hero : YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!...
??? : Him? You mean he's given you some weapons?
M.O.M : Yes, I think I did...I don't remember though.
Hero : ...Wait a minute...

- thinking time -

If I killed him...and I left him there and ran off...how could he have got here before I did? I know...maybe he's magic! And our survey says - *buzzer*...He's impervious to bullets! *buzzer*



- end thinking time -

Tide : Hey, my name's Tide, what weapons did you get?
Hero : Uh, a legendary sword, an intelligent shield, a piece of plastic with string attached and an empty gun. How about you?
Tide : I've got this awesome bow! It gives me a +15 strength bonus!
Hero : Lemme guess, it's called 'Hero's Bow'.
Tide : Yeah, yeah! And I've got this kick-ass boomerang that makes mini-whirlwinds! It gives me a +4 evasion bonus!
Hero : These weapons seem unusually familiar.
Tide : And I've got these bombs.
Hero : Hmmmmm...
Tide : And I've got this cool Master Sword!
Hero : *Zelda tune plays in head*
Tide : Oh, and I'm a ...

What is Tide?

A : A game nerd.
B : A lawyer for Disney.
C : An hero. (it's an internet meme, it's intentionally spelt with an 'n')
D : (what is your profession?) Spartan.

b

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You're too late Matt, I already updated it.

b

Rofl I fail.

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A also u sed an hero it should be a hero

Yes I did that on purpose.

A : 1
B : 2
C : 0
D : 1

B will win at this rate, so get voting if you don't want Tide to be a lawyer for Disney!

aaaaaaaa plz thanks